Emerging from an extensive repertoire of case studies gathered over 40 years and through 4 generations, DOLF, the Distribution Of Love in Families, is a theory that focuses on the Mind of a Child, and is built around the critical…
Theoretical Considerations
Why People Lie
DOLF makes it clear that, contrary to popular belief in current psychology, punishment, discipline, consequences, policing and even the fear of being physically attacked, are NOT deterrents to Angry, rebellious behavior! This is because, when misbehavior occurs, there are powerful…
Explaining the DOLIF Formula
In talking with my clients, I am acutely aware of the need to be tactful when introducing them to DOLF concepts. To make a DOLF diagnosis, I first try to find the client’s Prime Loving parent, or PLG. I suggest that when they…
The Human Urge to Hide Depression
It seems that humans feel a natural urge to hide feelings of Depression from others. But WHY? The answer reaffirms how Intellectual endowment renders humans so different from animals. Although we don’t really know how animals feel, it seems that the human need to…
The Causes of Mental Illness, Criminal and Child Behavior
THE “WHY” BEHIND ABERRANT BEHAVIOR In DOLF psychology there are two types of cognition. We are born with the Mind Of A Child where thoughts, decisions and behavior come from the Emotions or “gut”. At the beginning of life when…
The Key to Motivation
Our lives are riddled with Competition, Rivalry and outright Jealousy! DOLF alerts us that the urge to compete is is embedded at the primal level of the human psyche. It is a drive that is as archaic as our DNA and…
Pursuit of Parental LOVE – Part 1 and Part 2
DOLIF, the Distribution Of Love In Families, represents almost half a century of research in child development. The theory was a product of Vera Rabie’s doctoral level of education, professional psychology practice, hands-on experience with raising children, and intimate knowledge of four generations of families. The author built…
WHY on Earth Did You Do It? – Part 2
To recap from Part 1, the Disfavored personality shows behavior that is under Emotional dominance and lacks policing by the Intellectual faculties. Typical of the Disfavored personality is thinking and behavior that either lacks Social Maturity along the Depression/Anxiety spectrum…
WHY on Earth Did You Do It? – Part 1
DOLF introduces a new domain in psychology called The Mind Of A Child, where behavior is governed by Emotions. This domain functions very differently from the Adult Mind, which relies on Intellectual logic and reason. Imagine dividing the body at the neck. At…
Parental Anger and CBT – Part 1
When a child misbehaves, such as by hitting others, stealing or smoking cigarettes, current psychology directs parents to use Cognitive Behavioral methods, or CBT. It makes logical sense to parents when CBT advises them to act as a team, decide on consequences or punishment, and follow through with…
The (Thorny) Question of Research
The question of why DOLIF theory grew out of experience and empirical observation rather than conventional laboratory research is one I am continually asked. First, I am filled with gratitude for the years of academic training that gave the groundwork for my interminable curiosity about…