There are several sources of proof that DOLIF Theory is valid and a realistic method to use both to improve family dynamics in normal families, and for treatment purposes with children and adults. The first practical proof is the application…
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DOLF stands for the DISTRIBUTION OF LOVE IN FAMILIES. VERA RABIE, Doctor of Psychology, uncovered a new psychological domain called the Mind of a Child that changes our understanding of the human mind. DOLF is like a stream of consciousness that follows Emotions instead of intellect because that…
A Boy Who Was Hurting Animals
A mother came in with her eight-year-old boy. They both looked sad and angry, the boy frowning. He did not look at me when I greeted him, and when he sat down, turned his head toward the window. The mother…
Phase 4 – How Favoritism Develops
In DOLIF psychology instinctual SIBLING RIVALRY and parental Favoritism give rise to divergence in personality and behavior among adjacent siblings. But exactly HOW does this come about? It is well understood that parents have the best intentions to raise their children so they can be proud of them. If…
Phase 3 – The Development Of Personality And Behavior
Acting on instinct, Emotion-driven thought and primitive reasoning that confines them to their Mind of a Child, the first two children are both burdened by their immature perception of a limited amount of parental LOVE and consumed by their desperation…
Phase 2 – The Beginning Of Sibling Relations
After a year or two, family relationships become settled. PLG and Child 1 engage in a LOVING relationship in their Inner Circle of Love, while the Outer Circle of Love includes the ALG who provides Support, Stability and Security. Over time,…
Phase 1 – The Division Of Parental Roles
As soon as a first child is born, a critical Emotional decision is made that is vital to children but difficult for adults to understand. Parents divide into one…
The Rest Of The Sibline
How does Sibling Rivalry take place and how is Favoritism distributed in a family of 5 children, or more? As discussed in the blogs about 3 siblings (The Third Child, Third Child Concerns, and The Case Of A Third Daughter With A…
The Case Of A Third Daughter With A Severe Anxiety Disorder
A set of concerned parents came to see me with their 8-year-old daughter, the youngest of 3 girls. From our first introduction, it was obvious that the girl had many nervous twitches, such as blinking her eyes, gnashing her teeth…
Vulnerable Third-Born Girls In A Series Of Three Girls
A Case of Three Daughters A woman came into my office and, before we could say our greetings, began sobbing. She was 68 years of age and said she had had a good life raising her 3 daughters. She said…
Two Case Studies of 4-Sibling Families
Here are two real-life examples of 4-sibling families whom this author observed from the time they were growing up, a span of about 20 years each. The first family came to see me when they had only two children and…
Third Child Concerns
Often talked about and popularized by Birth Order Theory is the “middle child syndrome” that describes middle children as the most agitated and bothersome because they are believed to be ‘squeezed’ between the first and last and get the least…